Here is the Washington Post’s Mensa Invitational which once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

2006 winners are:

• Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
• Ignoranus: A person who’s both stupid and an *()^%$ .
• Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.
• Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
• Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating.
• Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
• Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high
• Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn’t get it.
• Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
• Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
• Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)
• Karmageddon: It’s when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, and then the Earth explodes and it’s a serious bummer.
• Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
• Glibido: All talk and no action.
• Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
• Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you’ve accidentally walked through a spider web.
• Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out
• Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you’re eating.